Comments on mobileWOMEN.org: It's Not Polite to Stare!

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Sometimes staring is because a person is so good l...

2011-08-22T19:08:49.596-04:00

Sometimes staring is because a person is so good looking, male or female. It doesn't matter if they are in a wheelchair, etc. Just smile and say, 'Hello.' There are so many different handicaps today, I really don't think people are staring at that. If you would see Jen in person you could see why people are staring. They probably don't even know she's in a wheelchair! She's absolutely gorgeous and a personality to match. Thanks for this wonderful column. You're a true Angel.

I am a hemi-pelvectomy amputee (no hip or pelvis) ...

2011-08-22T17:38:07.863-04:00

I am a hemi-pelvectomy amputee (no hip or pelvis) and use crutches to get around - people ALWAYS stare... I have found the BEST way to cope is to stare right back at them and SMILE with a big hello. It's an ice breaker and makes people see you as a person not an object of pity or a curiousity. Some days it's annoying but most days I'm just too busy being grateful to be here to care if people find me 'stare' worthy...
Glenda Standeven
co-author 'Choosing to Smile'

I think it's just something you get used to. ...

2011-08-22T10:41:23.258-04:00

I think it's just something you get used to. It's not really THAT big of a deal anyway. Staring has been around forever and it will always be around. You have no control over it except for how you let it affect you.

Here's a tip: pretend you are famous.

Here's another tip: It's not a crime. Get over it.

Since I've used a wheelchair my entire life, i...

2011-08-21T22:31:13.749-04:00

Since I've used a wheelchair my entire life, it rarely phases me when someone stares. Mostly, though, it's children...and I am always glad when I hear a parent explain the wheelchair to their child at that moment (this even happened today!). Other parents pull their kids away in horror that their kid is looking or out of embarrassment, but I prefer when that moment becomes teachable rather than making the child feel bad for looking. I love the opportunity to have a parent educate their child or for me to welcome questions because I think understanding leads to compassion. I'll never forget, when I was in high school, I once did a Q&A session at an elementary school. That first morning when I was going down the halls, kids were pointing and whispering, not having had much experience with people who use wheelchairs....Then, when I had gone through all the classes, and I went down the halls, these same children literally were waving at me, smiling and so many even ran up to me to give me a hug! Education is the key, for children and adults alike. Nowadays I go through each day knowing that people will watch me walk down the street, especially as they see I'm a mom, and people always look in awe when my car opens with the cool ramp, but I just treat this all as if I'm a celebrity...only without all the perks and autograph-signing! Maybe one day! :)

great article! On most days I don't even noti...

2011-08-21T17:04:58.682-04:00

great article! On most days I don't even notice the stares anymore, I have so much more going on to care. On days I am in the mood I will take that opportunity to educate. On not so good days I am totally annoyed by it and will actually act just as rude (very rare, but hey I am human!)

great article! On most days I don't even noti...

2011-08-21T17:04:33.048-04:00